THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME

Had a dream last night, in which I found myself wondering around aimlessly from place to place.  At some point I realized that even though the places I ventured to were grand and just visually magnificent, I still felt unsettled and could not understand why my heart ached and why the thoughts of familiar voices, smells and sights were literally eating away at my exisitence... my core...my soul.

In the mist of all this confusion, I thought that if I could do a little self taking, I could make it all go away. To my surprise, the harder I tried to displace, forget or abandon this raging rollercoaster in my head, the deeper and more penetrating the wounds became.

As my mind raced on, I searched to try and understand the anguish the people of Haiti and other countries who have experienced recent devastation, must feel being lost and displaced from their homes.

In my dream, I too was losing this war of life, to emptiness and longingness. 

Webster describes a home as a place in which ones domestic affections are centered; a dwelling or retreat; a place of refuge; the destination or goal.

The very moment I surrendered to the consciousness of my heart, and ceased  from carrying the sword of blame; of anger and the sword of hate, was when I clearly saw a path towards a place where there was no signs of crying, sickness, pain, or death.

It was a place filled with familiarity, peace, love and happiness..... a place to call my own.

The dream and the search ended.

HAPPY TRAILS!

LOVING MY PAST

I remember it well.. just as if it was happening all over again.  Its the middle of the week and I'm about 14 or 15 years old. I'm sitting right next to my father, while visiting him during my spring break from school.  As we sat and talked, we somehow managed to start up a conversation about his father, (my grandfather) whom I've never known or ever seen pictures of.  It was like talking about some unknown person who you would see in a dream or some unknown character in a story book.  I was beginning to think that any discussion raised about of my ancestors was taboo, or perhaps it was just that we had never taken advantage of the opportunity to discuss them.

As our talks on the subject became more detailed over those memorable five days, I knew then that they were the most incredible and enjoyable lessons of our personal history I had ever encountered.  In short, I was hooked.  At the end of my stay and before returning back to my home in Miami, we both decided that on my next summer visit with him, I would write down on paper all the events and stories he would share.

Prior to my return the following year......, my father died.

Today, I have a family of my own, consisting of adult children from my first marriage and one teenager from my second time around.  Additonally, I also have one amazing grandson.

Recently, while talking with my teen daughter, about some behavioral changes in her math class, she and I also had some discussion about being grateful for all the things we as a family were blessed to have. I then told her about some of the disadvantages that I grew up with in an effort to make a comparison.

As I began to tell her about growing up in the "ghetto" and such, I suddenly noticed her facial expression and the look of total confusion on her face, as if she was saying, "Dad, what in the hell are you talking about?"

After all, she was born in the suburbs and had only heard about the ghetto via movies, tv, and my abstract way of painting the picture for her.  She literally was encapable of connecting the dots.

Suddenly, like the sound of a rushing and mighty wind; the clanking of large cymbals crashing together, the answer to this issue became apparently clear..... FIELD TRIP!!

We jumped into the car, and I gave her a personal tour of what and where it all began as I remembered it.  We traveled to the hospital where I was born; the diferent areas and houses I grew up and lived in; the schools I attended; as well as the areas and houses her sibblings grew up and shared together. The tour ended back to where life as she was most familiar with began... in the suburbs.

I have since, taken all of my children on this historical tour of my small life. To further enhance their mini- travels back into our families ancestrial past, I also invested in a genealogical program that has helped to fill in all the gaps. The program introduces them to family members, places and events, that would otherwise be presented and recieved by them, much like an unsubstantiated old folks tale.  But, with the help of an online version, I'm able to invite and educate my family members irregardless of where they may reside in the world. 

As I reflect back on the gift my father attemped to shared with me before his death, I truly understand how important it is for families everywhere to build incredible and lasting relationships, even if through the most difficult of times.  Here's what I know...

Don't wait until its to late.. to make a love connection of your own. 

       

Loving Equally

Does he or she really mean it when they say, "I Love You Too".  What are the signs? 

I'm not an expert on Love and relationships but, here's what I've observed and experienced...

While stating the obvious, sometimes they do and sometimes they don't. 

This process is and can be so complicated, yet so very simple. Lets try refusing to focus so much of our driven energies on futile attempts to read each others mind.  I believe our time would be better spent and greater results can be achieved through all the incredible and actively shared time we spend together.  Doing so, redirects the focus to the heart and soul of the matter... The Overwhelming and Blessed Opportunity to "Just Love".

Giving and receiving Love Equally, is much more than what appears to be on the surface. It requires action, honesty, sacrifice, as well as joint and total commitment of all parties involved. 

People understandably, spend a lifetime in Love, but... is that which they've chosen to dedicated their Love to, capable of returning the favor?

Some folk Love with all their hearts, their jobs; houses; land; silver; gold and sometimes too much of themselves. The returns are not only consuming and clouded, but they can be shortlived when searching for long term Love related residuals.

With all the aforementioned lovables that we can attached our existence to, I tend to ask myself the following:

Can I truly rely solely on my job; my bank account etc., to Love me equally when I encounter sickness; dispair; lonliness or become motherless, friendless, homeless or penniless?

Hopefully, its a knowledgable fact, whether through personal experience or not, that reciprocated Love can not and will not survive by force, coerosion or deception. It must be rooted, and produce through mutual respect and most importantly.... EARNED.

IN CAPABLE HANDS

There are just those incredible times when things that were heading towards a path of success, somehow and without reason appear to eludes us.  What happen, what went wrong, who do I and what can I blame for this new stumble in my business; my relationship; my life?

The answer we seek is discoverable and easy to pinpoint.  Sometimes the answer is as close as the man/woman in the mirror.  But, can we honestly except this new clear discovery? 

I personally have found it a great resolve to be able to hold myself accountable for my own failures as well as my own successes, even if its somewhat of a bitter cup at times to swallow. 

I remember a few months ago, when a friend approached me with a business opportunity.  After listening intently to his bid, a few things he said stuck out.  One was his overwhelming enthusiasm about all the money he was going to make.  He basically shouted out that, it was a brand new concept in an industry that was going to change the way everyone was looking at going 'Green".  Then he carried on about how, I should get in right now, at the ground level and at the beginning and most importantly I needed to dump whatever I was presently involved in and get signed up. Well, true it did all sound incredible and exciting.  So, not meaning to burst his bubble and because he was my friend, I felt compelled to remind him of a few things I thought was cruicial to our conversation.

I looked him square in the eye and said Jack, all of this sounds and appears to be the "ONE", but remember successful businesses have taken time and work to be and maintain tenure in any industry.

The bottom line is.. YOU still have to build it!

I say this because no matter what the goal, dream or venture we connect ourselves to, we are the main spoke in the wheel that will move the many missions we take on daily. WE are the real reasons of make it or break it.  Of course, others situations encountered do factor in as contributors to the overall outcome, but its us; the we; the YOU, who decided to turn left vs right,; to say no verses yes; the one who chose to guess about it, rather than to actually know about it.

It's on me, its on you, so the question is.....

ARE YOU IN GOOD HANDS?